Standing Alone
I am 22 years old girl who is facing a graduation from university and eager to gain my freedom from the restriction of parents. I have recently been thinking about the independence from my parents. The independence from parents that I am saying is both financial and mental independence. In other words, I have to be able to keep my life and finances by myself and not to mentally rely on parents. I should be able to solve the problems I have in my daily life without parents' help. When and how would I completely stand on my feet?
As most Korean parents are, my parents are more or less conservative. They don't want me to get home late and even call me too many times whenever I hang out with friends at night. They always say that they worried me. I always answer them I grow old enough to keep to myself and they don't need to care about me at every moment. However, they did not change their attitude toward me. It made me feel like I was getting too much controlled. The more they did like that, the more I got rebellious mind. I longed for freedom for a long time. One night, I hung out with my friends as usual. On the particular day, the weather was perfect and the breeze was nice enough to make me worry about nothing like "It is 11o'clock, I have to go home." But I was getting scared of being scolded for arriving at home late. Moreover, I didn't want to make the relationship between my parents and me worse. The more repeated fatiguing situation, the greater I didn't get to know why I am naturally at home until around 12am. It is my life to decide when I get back home. Ironically, my parents wanted me to be financially independent. They wanted me to earn my living, buy clothes, cell phone and laptop with my money and sometimes pay my school expenses. I think it is natural at my age to be ready for financial independence if I have a power to make a decision on everything about me. But I had no power even to set the time to get back home. In this situation, I think it is not naturally reasonable. So I have declared that I will live on my own. I struggled for having a chance to live alone and failed every moment. My parents claimed that I have no capacity to be financially independent and I am too young to stand on my feet. Also they said I am not prepared to live away from home where parents are because I don't know how to cook "rice" the basic way to make a meal and they thought I would not clean my room if I live apart from them. In spite of their expectation, I just decided to do it without thinking about things that are going to happen to me. – To be continued
I think what you are writing about and the situation you are in is very interesting because it is in some parts simillar to what I have in mind. Like beeing independet. But it is also so different to what I have experienced in my family. I didn't quite understand some in the middle part, maybe you can explain it to me again, but I am looking forward to know how your setuation will turn out! - Kat
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